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Agent Sillyboots

I'm not even sure I need to know.


Can't even let a funeral be a funeral.

Some people.

"She extended Martin's message against poverty, racism and war. She deplored the terror inflicted by our smart bombs on missions way afar. We know now that there were no weapons of mass destruction over there," Lowery said.


"But Coretta knew, and we know," Lowery continued, "That there are weapons of misdirection right down here," he said, nodding his head toward the row of presidents past and present. "For war, billions more, but no more for the poor!" The crowd again cheered wildly.

I guess it's just about impossible to have one solemn moment where politics kind of take a back seat, at least for a little while. Mrs. King's funeral could've been the perfect time to settle down and mourn the loss of a life. But no! Personal political beliefs had to be frivilously injected once again.

I suppose the few weeks after 9/11 were the United States' last times of politic-free solitude. In a post-9/11 world, politics go with every situation as easily as milk goes with chocolate brownies.

Agent Sillyboots out.


We'll teach you what we do to real perverts around here...

I'm just not sure what this was meant to do. Perhaps it was meant to get the other fighter into some sort of off-balance state. Who knows. Plus, it's funny to hear the little Japanese guy say "homosexual."

I do have a friend who was in a similar situation. An older guy was getting up in his face and talking smack and my friend licked his nose. That pretty much ended all of that. It's still funny to this day.

Agent Sillyboots out.

Carson Daly's a fake

So I'm sitting around the house tonite, a bit tipsy, and I'm watching TV. I see the Carson Daly Show or whatever and he's wearing some tiny dress jacket. He says that maybe he can do "the Chris Farley thing." So he says...get this....

"Fat man in a little jacket...."

The crowd loves it.

Hey, you pseudo-trendy pop has-been, it's "Fat guy in a little coat."

TRL has moved on. Maybe you should, too.

Agent Sillyboots out.


You were our boy, Blue.

Patrick Cranshaw, just another actor who achieved cult-like status because of a comedy movie, died on January 1, 2006.

You know him as Blue.

This is just a tribute.

Agent Sillyboots out.

P.S. It seems that "Blue" was born in Bartlesville, OK (my home state). He also helped entertain our troops before WWII. What a guy.


Big Screen Version


Enjoy the whole thing, but do listen for the use of the word "nipple clips."

Via GM.

Agent Sillyboots out.


Tookie Died

Finally! Now all of us in the White People Guild of America (a coalition with 20 kazillion evil white people) can rest knowing that we've executed yet another black person who did nothing else but be black. Yay! Watch out, black people! We (and by "we", I mean "every white person in America because everyone of us obviously hates all black people") are roaming the streets looking for dark skinned people to persecute.

Look what we did in New Orleans! I bet you didn't know that White People can control the weather. I bet you didn't know that White People can create storms that specifically target blacks. Sure showed you!

But honestly, people...

I doubt that racism had anything to do with Gov. Schwarzenegger denying clemency to Tookie Williams. I think it had a bit more to do with Williams' brutal slaying of four people in two different instances. If race was involved at all, it was Tookie's racist hatred for white people that caused him to murder Albert Owens. Let's not forget the Tawainese Yang family that Tookie murdered. Do black people hate Asians now?

When James Byrd, Jr. (a black man) was murdered in Texas, there were all types of calls for the (white) men who did it to be dealt with...harshly. Well, 2 of them were sentenced the death penalty and one life in prison. Jesse Jackson threw his two cents in there, as well.

If Tookie had committed those heinous crimes in Texas anytime after 2001 (where the Democrat-supported "James Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Act" allows for tougher penalties in crimes where a discriminatory bias was the motive), he would've definately been sentenced to the death penalty anyway. Ah, the irony.

I suppose the boys at South Park were right when they held a trial for Cartman (a white kid) because he threw a rock at Token (a black kid). The judges decision:

If you're going to commit a crime against someone, you'd better make damn sure that they're the same color as you.
I'm glad that Tookie found peace with himself (if that's true) and I'm glad that he tried so hard to keep kids out of gangs. But his gang membership was not on trial back in 1981. It was the murder of 4 human beings. He can renounce and show sadness for gang membership and black-on-black violence all day long, but that in no way relates to his case at all. He never even admitted guilt for the crimes he was convicted. Why in the world would anyone even consider granting this man clemency for murders he still claims he's innocent of and shows no remorse for?

Wasn't a lack of remorse sort of a defense-killer for Scott Peterson? He never appeared like he even cared about what he had done. It didn't sit well with the jury.

But oh well. The Peterson case was white-on-white violence. Murder is never really serious until someone throws a little soul into the mix.

Agent Sillyboots out.


Think about it.

Take this home. Chew on it. Tastes good, don't it?

But really, it makes sense.

Agent Sillyboots out.

UPN, here we come.

Wow...just wow. I knew it. Al Sharpton's been acting like a crazed idiot for years just to set up a half-season of unfunny crap. I love this quote, though:

He added that in the show, "I am the center of a family with different social and political views and we crack jokes and confront each other but are a family."

I'm glad he's started with the black jokes early and has already made use of the word "crack."

Agent Sillyboots out.


Still Here

Man, I've been busy. And not "busy" in the classical sense...like..."I've had a lot of things to do lately and no time to post." More like..."I'm a lazy douche...and that's it."

I just haven't felt like posting much lately. It's the holiday season and it's been busy at my job. My partner at work was sick all last week and this week she's been on vacation.

Thanks, Sam!

Also, a good friend of mine from work has been having health problems and he's going to be in a lot of pain for a while. For those of you who like to mention names in your prayers, his name is Cozax. He's good people.

I've had some cool things go on in the past few weeks and I'll get to some of them tomorrow since I'm off. Hopefully I'll have some pictures, too.

Agent Sillyboots out.


I'll bet he claims the LAPD did it...

What would urge someone to do this? Was it a bet? Who knows? It's funny, though.

Please beware that there are NSFW ads on this page. Nekid people. I have no idea how videos like this end up on pages with such raunchy pictures on it.

Another gem from GM.

Agent Sillyboots out.

What a twist!

I consider myself a pretty smart guy. But I still didn't even see this coming.

NSFW: loud cussing.

Via GorillaMask, of course.

Agent Sillyboots out.


lol...Trashlee Simpson

WWTDD? is quickly becoming an aphrodesiac for me. Well, maybe not. But I do like the site and all of the pictures he manages to find.

Here's a great piece of video that shows Ashlee Simpson in her element: McDonald's at 1:30am, completely drunk.

Boy howdy, wouldn't she be fun to hang around with? Nope.

Via GorillaMask.

Agent Sillyboots out.


What a job

So I was looking at WWTDD? and came across this gem.

"There was more discussion about Superman’s package than anything else on the suit. Was it too big? Was it not big enough? Was it too pointy? Too round? It was somebody’s job for about a month, just working on codpiece shapes."

Yeah, real nice. I would love to see the emails that the "Codpiece Shape Engineer" sent back home to his mom trying to explain his role in the new Superman movie.

"Dear mom,

I'm so excited to be working on the new Superman movie! I did get a decent job and my role is at the foreskin forefront of the entire project. My phallus talent will really come through. I have a chance to work my way up the testicle ladder here in Hollywood. Everyone on the project has been sexy great so far and I expect a decent bulge check for my work on this penis project. I'll write you later with more coitus details.

Balls Love,

Your Son"

Agent Sillyboots out.

Still Around

I've been on vacation since October 28th and I haven't really been at home. I'm not even at home now. I'm about 11 hours away from home living it up. When I get back, I'll hopefully keep myself on a more regular posting basis. As for now and until around Friday, I might not post again.

In my absence, fill your eyes with these media buffets:


Ebaums World

What Would Tyler Durden Do?


Agent Sillyboots out.


Now here's an informative headline, or not.

Someone got lazy.

That's like saying, "Eating raw sewage may lead to various diseases, or not."

Via Gorilla Mask.

Agent Sillyboots out.


What game did he actually have in mind?

If "hide the salami" wasn't the game that DNC Chairman Howie D. had in mind when he made this reckless remark, then I'm curious as to what game exactly he was thinking of. (Go to that link and click on the "Launch" button to watch Dean further his career as a buffoon).

Maybe he was thinking of "find the tea cup", which I heard he used to play with his Aunt Rose under the covers.

Via Gorilla Mask.

Agent Sillyboots out.


Just a Thought

I think my new favorite series is Six Feet Under. I've been watching Season 1 on DVD and I just can't quit watching. They did a great job casting the roles and the writing is top notch. The characters and situations bring to life the career of "undertaker" and shows how human nature can be at its lowest, whether its in the life of a "customer" or the undertakers themselves.

The character that I'm not a fan of, however, is Brenda, the "counter-culture" artsy feminist who was writing novels at the age of 5. She's way too high maintenance. She puts her boyfriend through so many pointless trials and she expects him to completely accept everything about her without asking any questions.

However, she did make a very interesting observation. Her, her brother, and her boyfriend were talking about the death of a 6 year old boy from a self-inflicted shotgun wound. Her brother talks about other cultures and how they view the death of a child. He says that it's so needlessly taboo in our society to talk about a dead child because our culture is so adament about its ability to reverse the order of nature. Brenda offers subtle insight as to why it may be taboo to discuss a dead child in our culture: "It's odd. When your spouse dies, you're called a widow. If you're a child and your parents die, you're called an orphan. But what about a parent who loses a child? There's no name for that. Maybe it's something so horrible that it doesn't even have a name."


Agent Sillyboots out.

Important Studies

I was looking online to see when I was going to have to forget to turn my clock back for Daylight Saving Time (I did find out that the official spelling is Daylight Saving Time instead of Daylight Savings Time...so you need to update your vernacular). I found this site explaining the whole deal. An interesting tidbit for you:

"On August 8, 2005, President George W. Bush signed the Energy Policy Act of 2005. This Act changed the time change dates in the U.S. Beginning in 2007, DST will begin on the second Sunday of March, and end the first Sunday of November. Note that the Secretary shall report to Congress on the impact of this change. Congress retains the right to revert the Daylight Saving Time back to the 2005 time schedules once the Department study is complete."

O...kay. Is this still an issue? It's odd that in our modern time, we would rather force time itself to bend to our laziness. Instead of people just getting up and going to bed earlier like Benjamin Franklin suggested (and thus adapting to our planet's natural environment), we have our federal government actually wasting time (and daylight...ironic!) to actually discussing this in front of God and Congress. Well, I hope the "Department study" into the "impact" of the change of DST will be a fruitful one.

I'm just waiting on a "Department study" on the "impact" of when they change "401(k)" to just "401k."

Agent Sillyboots out.


Whetsel's Army

As I've posted before, I'm in a Halo clan on Xbox Live. We get together at random times during the week and always on Sunday nites to play custom games and if we're feeling ballsy, we'll try a Big Team Battle or Major Clanmatch.

The masterful Pvt. Whetsel and his German webmaster partner-in-crime ShortBusKid (Mikey) put together a great website for us that I've plugged before. However, they've changed quite a bit and have added a slew (yes, I said slew) of new features and little add-ons that make it a good piece of internet ass.

Also, look down at the lower right hand corner of our front page and watch Mikey's little roster thingie so he'll shut up about it.

Again, my Xbox Live handle is Sillyboots...if you dare.

Come Get Owned...or not.

Agent Sillyboots out.


Misdirected Hostilities

Maybe it's just me, but I really think this could fall under the category of misappropriation of federal funds. A "porn squad" is not a worthwhile effort, I don't believe. That's a waste of taxpayer money that could go towards getting us out of Iraq a few months earlier. Porn is going to exist in some form and I think it's reasonably confined to "appropriate" media. Private companies (aka "not federally funded") are taking it upon themselves to manufacture and market products that help eliminate accessible pornography to children, whether it be on the internet, the TV, and soon coming to cell phones. I think that's capitolism and a free market in action. That's ok. There is a perceived need for that service and so a private company is fulfilling that need. No problem there. It's when the federal government decides that it wants to step in and say that it has the authority to "investigate obscenity cases" which would lead to prosecution of consenting adults who committed no actual crime other than getting freaky deaky in front of a video camera, which is no real crime at all.

The only thing I see the federal government even becoming somewhat legitmate at investigating is people who knowingly and blatantly offer pornography to children. Perhaps they could start with those spammers who keep sending me links to "fun down on the farm", "grandma and grandson share a fishing trip", and "all the scat you can handle." Those people are the true terrorists. Yuck.

Agent Sillyboots out.